All wire posts

I wanna try, Incan hamster, Singaporean dog, Japanese whale meat, and I think I may try fried scorpion in Thailand, and US buffalo

I've eaten alligator, shark, eel, sea urchin, octopus, venison, quail, duck, donkey, horse, possum, kangaroo, goat and rabbit

I've eaten everything except fried Asian insects, dog meat and yak testicles

Tay is horrified by shrimp, Trump is horrified by Lobster…he thinks it's an alien life form

…which could only be better if she married Tay's dad, then her cuisine dream is fullfilled

Ariana's 1st marriage was with self proclaimed Taco genius, he could cook anything as long as it was Tacos, Britney perfect marriage fantasy

Taylor Swift's dad is an international natcho chef, he can cook anything as long as it's natchos

@TaylorSwift13 I would one day like to sicko-analyse your brother, sippo-analyse you monster and natcho-analyse your dad

(sly aside , “obviously deficient in Grolsch hormones”)

@ddlovato how do I poetically compare you to a genetically mixed bottle of Peroni and Corona, with a touch of Carlsberg elephant on the mind

@TaylorSwift13 Tay my sucko-analysis of you says you are dating a football star because you are a frustrated sports journo

Tay lives in her Neil Simon odd couple NY apartment where Tay is the sports writer and I am the intellectual Felix that cleans up after her

Lovato lives in houses that look like the Brady Bunch home, Spears looks likes she lives in a Drug Cartel Mansion

Lovato thinks I breathe 100% too much

Tay thinks I'm dirty unless talking speculative investments in the US stock market

PERSONALS: desperately searching for matching perfect snatch

Trumps Nationalism instead of global engagement is like a middle manager trying to fake being CEO, he can only see a small, not big picture

Trumps 2 terms of controlled interest rates and trade barriers was a redux of stagflation of the 1970s, every economist quickly recognised

Trump a myopic dyslexic got scared he could not manage globalisation that was bringing rapid prosperity, so was nostalgic for regulation.